States I’ll (Probably) Never Visit: Nevada

Sorry, Nevada, but it’s true. You’re currently in the “probably never visit” list, though depending on how elections go this fall, you might just get bumped up to never. Why? Because Sharron Angle, the Republican looking to unseat Harry Reid, might actually win. This is particularly alarming, though, because she is fucking crazy.

Following up on her comments about how she is against abortion in cases of rape or incest because it’s against God’s plan, she explained that you should use that sort of opportunity to make lemonade:

STOCK: What do you say then to a young girl… [who] is raped by her father, let’s say, and she is pregnant. How do you explain this to her in terms of wanting her to go through the process of having the baby?

ANGLE: I think that two wrongs don’t make a right. And I have been in the situation of counseling young girls, not 13 but 15, who have had very at risk, difficult pregnancies. And my counsel was to look for some alternatives, which they did. And they found that they had made what was really a lemon situation into lemonade.

That’s right, kids! Find yourself in a particularly lemony situation? Go ahead and make lemonade while you’re giving birth to a child that is both your daughter and your sister. You go ahead and think about how fucked up that is.

Anyway, Nevada, if you vote for her in the fall, I’ll be forced never to visit you. Actually, maybe I’ll just never visit you because you let it get this far.

July 10th, 2010 - Posted in states i'll never visit |

States I’ll Never Visit: Louisiana

I’ve started a list of states that I will never visit, and I’m going to share it with you guys. This list certainly isn’t exhaustive and I will most certainly have duplicates, if only because these states are increasingly ridiculous. I could have started with Arizona – they’ve certainly given us enough reasons not to go there – but I thought I’d start with Louisiana.

Louisiana has been hit pretty hard by the BP oil spill. Huge portions of their coastline have been devastated by oil, with marine life dying left and right and fishermen out of jobs because of it.  Oh, and that part where the oil spill is the worst spill of all time. But despite all that, their governor Bobby Jindal, as well as some other higher-ups in the state government, want to reopen offshore drilling. Hell, Jindal even wrote a letter to the president.

Look, I understand that people are out of jobs right now because of this. But you want to continue doing that thing that caused the spill in the first place? Really? Are you really that greedy that you can’t take some time to sort out the huge mess that you’re in? Maybe you should take all those people and pay them to help you clean up the gulf.

So until Bobby Jindal and/or those other people are out of office, I’ll never go to Louisiana. I guess I’ll have to hit up some places in the city for authentic Louisiana food.

June 10th, 2010 - Posted in states i'll never visit |

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